Foul Language

"craig-oesterling" (craig-oesterling)
03/04/2014 at 10:27 • Filed to: None

So, is anyone else tired of all the pointless swearing on Jalopnik? Just scanning the headlines this morning I'm seeing all kinds of crass words that have no business being there. It's been like this for a long time, but it seems to be getting worse. There are f and s words everywhere. Have we run out of superlatives? Are there no more accurate modifiers that can be employed? Let's turn our brains on and try to use words that have more positive meanings and connotations. The english language is rich and can be used beautifully. Why must we settle for the lowest, meanest forms it offers?

If you need help, get a thesaurus out.

DISCUSSION (56)

Party-vi > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:28

Penis.

Victorious Secret > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:29

Because good fucking sir, we can do whatever the fuck we fucking want. I can do the whole fucking thing, who is going to stop me?

Also, because if we all started writing like Harvard Law graduates with gigantic sticks up our asses, this site would be lame and professional and boring and too high brow.

So, fuck on. As you were. Fuckity fucking fuck.

But to your last point, having a thesaurus means nothing if you don't know how to use the words. Anyone can right click a word and get more to use, but whats the point? Then you just sound stupid. And people see through that.

And let me tell you, in this magical thing called 'real life', people do swear. I've seen it all. 12 year olds to NAME PARTNERS IN LAW FIRMS. Like they give a flying fuck.

Victorious Secret > Party-vi
03/04/2014 at 10:30

BENOIT

Übel > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 10:31

Goddamn right

Jonathan Harper > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 10:31

A- fucking- MEN!

Jonathan Harper > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 10:32

BALLS!

Victorious Secret > Jonathan Harper
03/04/2014 at 10:32

JUST THE TIP

CalzoneGolem > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:33

Fuck no! I love that shit!

Jonathan Harper > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 10:33

Best game EVAH. Shit I tell you what, you always fucking win!

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:35

You wouldn't happen to be the same guy that tried to get NSFW posts banned a month or two ago would you?

André - Volvo4Life > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:35

I agree.

The Transporter > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:35

It does get a tad bit excessive and looks unprofessional. If Jalopnik wants to get treated as a serious auto blog, then they'll have to grab that thesaurus.

Racescort666 > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:36

There are literally no curse words on the first page of Oppo right now. Headlines or otherwise.

Big Bubba Ray > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:37

Are you talking about Oppo or the FP or both? I scanned the headlines for both sites and only saw one "bad" word. It's the internet, man. With this many people contributing on one site, you can't expect the language to be as clean as if you were in a Sunday school class.

And plus, foul language is fucking fun to use, dammit.

craig-oesterling > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
03/04/2014 at 10:37

No, but I definitely would be all for that!

Osiris - I can haz Euro spec? > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 10:38

Mother Fucking YES!

Victorious Secret > The Transporter
03/04/2014 at 10:38

But the Thesaurus died so long ago :(

Kinja'd!!!

Osiris - I can haz Euro spec? > Party-vi
03/04/2014 at 10:38

Huevos.

Lekker > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:39

I know what you mean. And while I may not agree with you, I totally see your point. But the whole thing about Oppo is that it allows to talk and express ourselves, without having to worry about people getting too mad (Say like in gizmodo, or the FP sometimes, you name it). So while I myself don't use profanities that often, I would rather have the option to, than not. Because 'Murica.

Victorious Secret > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:39

Do you also go to a strip club and tell all the women to cover up because they're too revealing?

Tentacle, Dutchman, drives French > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:39

Seriously, I don't see what you mean. Let alone that I'm tired of it.

Then again, there are very few words that I find offensive. As for swearing, just for the sake of swearing (as opposed to really venting anger, frustration, and what have you) is something I can't recall seeing here.

RazoE > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:44

I honestly don't mind it, just because it shows the writers are laid back and normal guys like us. It's not a robotic blog, it's a blog run by humans, and those humans love cars. And cussing. Lost of cussing.

EL_ULY > Osiris - I can haz Euro spec?
03/04/2014 at 10:48

Huevo juice!!!!

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Jonathan Harper
03/04/2014 at 10:48

NAILED IT!
/Archer

Victorious Secret > Jonathan Harper
03/04/2014 at 10:49

YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH

Cynical > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:49

It's for clickbait.

EL_ULY > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:49

Keep JaloPPo rated G :]

Kinja'd!!!

Osiris - I can haz Euro spec? > EL_ULY
03/04/2014 at 10:50

Ha ha damn...that escalated...

puddler > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:51

fowl language?

Kinja'd!!!

spanfucker retire bitch > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:53

Fuck no I'm not. It'll be a cold day in hell when I listen to someone tell me to stop swearing on the god damn internet.

DailyTurismo > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 10:55

It is the nature of the "new unique visitor" based payment system used by all Gawker sites. The crazier the headline, the more likely people are to click on it and the more money for the writer — simple economic reasons.

Also, please forgive my regular fellow opponauts who seem to be jumping all over this post like this is jr high school — these are same chaps who are the first to call out racist, sexist and intolerant comments, so I can assure you they are good fellows and wouldn't normally randomly troll someone's post with dirty words.

One can only assume they have already begun their Mardi Gras celebrations and are a few drinks in. I will add my own foul language after my 11am cocktail.

Party-vi > Racescort666
03/04/2014 at 11:00

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

yamahog > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 11:00

I'm a New Yorker, that fuckin shit is basically a friendly greeting! I had to tone it way down when I moved to Michigan though.

And the thesaurus will only help my people find more things to yell in front of 'cocksucker' if we're not being friendly.

Nibby > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 11:08

I am the face of piss and shit and sugar
I do a crooked little dance with my funny little monkey
What I want, what I want is just your children
I hate what I have become to escape what I hated being
Calliopenis envy from your daddy
You're not gonna hear what he don't want to hear
What I say disgusts him
He wants to be me and that scares him
"let's do a funny little dance with my funny little monkey"
The black keys
Here is my real head, here is my real head
I wear this fucking mask because you cannot handle me
Here is my real head
They try to blink me not to think me
Don't want to bring me out
I am the rotten teeth, my fists are lined with suckers
My prison skin's an eyesore-mirror-sketch-pad
I am your son
Your dad
Your fag
I am your fad
Here is my real head, here is my real head
I wear this fucking mask because you cannot handle me
Here is my real head

PatBateman > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 11:13

So crass.

Much rude.

Such win.

Mikeado > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 11:13

Shit yes, motherfucker. Show those bastard cuntflaps who's the fucking boss of this shit pit! Swearing headlines limit the people willing to click on the articles to mature adults who can handle swearing and people who swear casually online themselves, which is only the majority of people. Those wank-stains don't know what's best for 'em!

:-P

Couldn't resist. But then, you must be ready for piss-taking dickheads like me if you're posting this in Oppo.

Racescort666 > Party-vi
03/04/2014 at 11:32

Ok, apparently the composite screen cap of oppo at the time of my comment won't upload but there is literally no curse words on there.

The Dummy Gummy > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 11:33

This shit really is getting out of fucking hand.

Party-vi > Racescort666
03/04/2014 at 11:38

Ah I didn't read and comprehend your comment. OP was referring to the front page of Jalopnik needing curse words to draw page views.

Ultrakill > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 11:38

Good Sir,

You are not the only one with this opinion. I totally agree with everything you said. Unfortunately sometimes we must endure meaningless cursing to get the information/entertainment that we seek in Jalopnik and other kinja sites.

Racescort666 > Party-vi
03/04/2014 at 11:50

Yeah, I realized that in the middle of my second post. Since 7am there has been only 1 headline with swearing in it. Honestly, the more irritating bit are the buzzfeed or click-bait headlines.

Party-vi > Racescort666
03/04/2014 at 11:51

Agreed, but Jalopnik has nothing on Gawker when it comes to clickbait headlines.

commander warsstar is smitten with subaru legacy outbacks (and redheads) > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 12:05

Kinja'd!!!

LOL, someone has a stick up their ass.

But it's on the internet, so who the fuck cares.

Now, I'd like to invite you to GTFAC. I used the acronym so that you don't have to read Go To Fuck A Camel on the internet.

Oh wait.

commander warsstar is smitten with subaru legacy outbacks (and redheads) > commander warsstar is smitten with subaru legacy outbacks (and redheads)
03/04/2014 at 12:06

Ah fuck, my gif isn't working. What the shit, Kinja?!

johncalvinyoung > Victorious Secret
03/04/2014 at 12:21

The difference is that there's no legitimate reason for me to visit a strip club. Jalopnik is a different story—and one I read regularly at work (as I am doing right now). Some comment threads make me reluctant to click on a link at work OR at home.

Victorious Secret > johncalvinyoung
03/04/2014 at 12:22

Welcome to the internet, don't let viewer discretion hit you on the ass on your way out.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > johncalvinyoung
03/04/2014 at 12:31

I'm not gonna fall back on the "you don't like it, go elsewhere" defense. But Oppo does not have office and non office times. It's full throttle all day long. If you're uncomfortable with what we post here popping up on your work computer, use your phone or wait till you get home.

Jonathan Harper > yamahog
03/04/2014 at 13:10

Fuck yea New York!

Jonathan Harper > CalzoneGolem
03/04/2014 at 13:11

Lol

Eric the RC guy > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 13:20

Fuck you you fucking cunt-stain piece of shit. If you don't like it leave, simple as that. There is literally nothing in the world that matters less to me than your hurt feelings. Fuck off.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 13:22

Holy fucking shit, best troll post EVA!

johncalvinyoung > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
03/04/2014 at 15:18

Note I did not say Oppo. I'm well aware that its rules are different. Jalopnik front page, though...

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > johncalvinyoung
03/04/2014 at 15:27

Woops...

My bad. I assumed you meant Oppo.

McLarry > craig-oesterling
03/04/2014 at 15:59

To me, excessive use of profanity has always been the trademark of the lazy writer... It can be a useful tool when used sparingly but becomes grating if called upon too frequently. Of course this is the internet so no surprise you're being vilified as a prude for saying something about it. People can say whatever they want on the internet...as long as they're not disagreeing with me ;)

johncalvinyoung > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather
03/04/2014 at 16:32

I don't care for that side of Oppo either, but FP material is at least theoretically moderated/edited to a higher standard.

Nibby > Übel
03/05/2014 at 00:21

Kinja'd!!!